


Counting on High Hopes

by anisstaranise



Series: Song Fic Drabble [1]
Category: Glee
Genre: M/M, Song fic, seblaine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-23
Updated: 2014-09-23
Packaged: 2018-02-18 12:55:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2349173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anisstaranise/pseuds/anisstaranise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sebastian needs to walk away</p>
            </blockquote>





	Counting on High Hopes

**Author's Note:**

> The title is an excerpt of lyrics from "Man on a Wire" by The Script.
> 
> I posted this fic along with the song's audio file on my Tumblr. Feel free to drop by. Thank you.

There was a searing pain from within.  
Physically impairing him.  
Emotionally draining him.  
  
His heart.

 ** _Who would have thought that I’d be here by myself?_**  
 ** _Who would have thought that you’d be bad for my health?_**  
  
His heart was broken.  
Is that what hearts do? Can they break?

Yes, Sebastian thought.  
Because his heart was just that; broken.

He closes his eyes. An image of Blaine appeared on his eyelids.  
His brain jumps to an image of a screaming Blaine, clutching his eye, drenched in red liquid.

**_Who would have thought about the cause and effect?  
Yesterday’s love is now tomorrow’s regret_ **

Sebastian shakes the thoughts. He gets up from his bed and walks to his desk.  
He fiddles with his phone, fingers itching over _Blaine Anderson_.  
  
 _ **No, I can’t look down**_  
 _ **I’m trying to fight the feeling**_  
 _ **I will fall to the ground**_  
 _ **If I ever see you**_

Or speak to you again, Sebastian thought.

**_'Cause I feel like I'm walkin' on tightrope_ **

He catches sight of a rose petal on the floor by his closet.  
The soles of his shoes must’ve threaded it along when he left the hall after _that_ proposal.

Without warning, images of an elated Blaine betrothed to another assaulted his memory.  
That searing pain resurfaced tenfold.  
  
He grabs his keys and dashes from the room, his feet carrying him in no particular direction; the rose petal chasing him away like a ghost.  
—-

Sebastian finds himself in New York.  
He weaseled his way into a charity showcase.  
He only has one reason for being here; the only reason that will ever matter.

Blaine.  
  
Blaine sings at the front of the room.  
Still ever the sex on a stick and still sings like a dream.  
He revels in Blaine’s voice, his melody.  
Let’s himself drown in a fantasy of Blaine, of him, of them.  
Of another life and love that could have been.  
  
Then Kurt joins him in a song.  
The fantasy shatters.

**_Who would have thought I’d see you with someone else?  
Who would have thought that I’d be in such a mess?_ **

He needs to stop doing this.  
He needs to stop hurting himself.  
  
He needs to let go;  
Of the “should have, would have, could have”,  
Of Blaine.

**_My heart is in my throat  
I’m counting on high hopes to get me over you_ **

“Let go, Sebastian,” a voice within whispers.  
For some reason, it’s Blaine’s voice.

And that’s what does it.  
A reality so cruel hits him:

Blaine’s made his choice.  
It’s not Sebastian.  
It will never be him.

**_I’m counting on high hopes to get me over you_ **

Sebastian makes a sizable donation.  
He grabs his coat and starts for the exit.  
  
He chances a look at a smiling Blaine.  
(The last look, he promised himself)  
  
He commits that smile to memory.  
   
Then he walks, soles heavy.  
The more space he puts between his heart and Blaine, the more it hurt.  
Like a band being stretched over its limit, never snapping- only hurting.  
  
 **** _The higher I get_  
The more I miss the ground  
No safety nets  
Now you’re not around  
  
But Sebastian needs this.  
He needs to do this.  
He needs to nurse a Blaine-shaped void within him.  
  
 ** _I have to keep walking_**  
 _To keep me from falling down_  
  
Sebastian stops at the door.  
“Goodbye, Killer,” he breathes.

And then he was gone.

—end—

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. Hope you liked it.


End file.
